In These Rooms, I often see a sign over the door or on the wall with the words “…We Understand...” That’s a crock of shit I thought. Yes, I get everyone in here has an addiction problem. Everybody in here is in search of a solution to their addiction issues. Most importantly, everybody in here has a story to tell.
But that understanding shit ends there. Alcohol never called me a nigger but some of y’all have. Alcohol ain’t leaving here headed to no damn Klan meeting, I mean Trump rally, but some of y’all are. Alcohol hasn’t lived a day in this life being a Blackman in America with a drinking problem and neither have most of the people I encounter In These Rooms. So, tell me, what exactly is it that y’all fucking understand?
In These Rooms this morning, I’m listening to the leader talk about his relationship with one of his former sponsees. He describes this cat named Tommie. As he is describing Tommie, he states that Tommie is a big dude, and according to him, Tommie is gay but Tommie is surprised when he learns that everyone knows “…he is a Big Queen…” At this point, I must resist the urge to offer the following opinion “…since you obviously ain’t woke, let me educate you on something. By your demeanor and insensitive comments, you’re clearly not a part of the LGBTQ community. Your use of the words like Queen, Fag or Queer are offensive since you have no standing to use those terms, and as an Africa-American, I just heard you use the term nigger. It’s the same damn thing. There’s a big sign over there that says We Understand. I guess your so-called understanding doesn’t include not being racist, sexist and homophobic…”
Yea, I objected to the notion that anybody could understand my shit that hasn’t walked with me on this journey or a mile in my shoes. That was my first inclination. Then, I remembered:
“…We are all fallen, flawed and fallible. We all have our demons. We all put our pants on one leg at a time. Most of us sit down to shit and we all have gangster proclivities. No one is better than anyone else for everybody has some shit going on and the ground is level at the foot of the cross. We are all trying to get home the best fucking way we know how…”
Hunter
I realized my objection wasn’t with the idea that anybody could understand my shit without walking in my shoes. My real objection was I am a badass becoming more fully human in a room full of people seeking to go from bad to good and sick to well. Or, as I heard somebody say “…I’m a dick in a room full of assholes…”
Samuel L. Jackson is one my favorite actors and heroes. I heard him say in a 60 Minutes Interview he plays roles and characters in movies not the way they are written nor necessarily the way he is directed. He says he plays the role so that, when the movie is over, the people leaving the theater will say of his character “…I don’t know where he’s going, but I’m going with him…”
I’m not In These Rooms seeking to be understood. I’m In These Rooms and working my program so, that when I leave, people say “…fucked up or not I wanna go with him…” If you can’t get with or roll with that, how in the hell can you claim We Understand? So no, I’m not about going from good to bad nor sick to well. The transformation I’m In These Rooms seeking is a badass becoming more beautiful. That’s my story and I’m sticking the fuck to it.
Read more about Hunter and tell your story. Listen to Hunter’s Podcast. All on wreckedamerica.com. In Wrecked America, #AuthenticUnderstandingMatters
The Struggle Continues…
