Scott is a white 38-year-old plant engineer. He is married but sleeps in the family guest bedroom. His wife of thirteen years isn’t divorcing him for their children’s sake. But she told him “…we may live under the same roof but we ain’t sleeping together…” Scott is facing a 5-year prison sentence for his third DWI in the last two years. In his In These Rooms share, he said “…Life gets a lot better. My sponsor keeps telling me that’s the blessing of the program…” Life getting a lot better, That’s The Game.
Life is not a fucking game. I heard it said, “…life’s a bitch and then you die…” Life is many things to many people but Scott’s share In These Rooms reminded me it ain’t a fucking game. It’s not a fucking game I get it. Does that mean we shouldn’t approach it or play it like a game? I was having a conversation with my sponsor Dr. JJ about my last blog on The Coolest Part. Dr. JJ shared with me about professional athletes who are masters of their craft, their game. He stated they share the skill of being able to slow the games they play down to the point where things appear to be happening in slow motion. The slowing of things to this point allows these amazing athletes to calculate and make the best decisions humanly possible in a matter of seconds.
Promise 2 of the Big Book In These Rooms says “…we are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness…” This is certainly life getting a lot better. How do we get there? Like these masters in sports, we need thinking that facilitates the achievement of our greatest aspirations while slowing down our decision making long enough to make the best decisions for us and others possible. That’s The Game. How can we achieve this? How do we get to this type of thinking?
Promise 3 says “…we will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.…” We need to get real about the past without regrets. This can be game-changing life thinking.
“…Regrets? Got no time for them shits. I put them in the rear-view mirror. I got a life to live. I feel fuckin’ amazing today livin’ ghetto fabulous and I ain’t lettin’ no shit from the past fuckin’ get in the way of the good shit I’m rollin’ with today…”
Fr. Esteban
“…I know regretting and I know freedom. I choose freedom every day of the week and twice on Sunday. Problem is choosing is not enough. Live intervenes if I like it or not. My life is okay today because I’m learning to trust in a power greater than myself. This walk has been simple and at the same time it’s been difficult as hell…”
X
“…It’s said time is money. When I look at the time I wasted chasing things and people in life that don’t matter, I wasted a lot of money Maan. Do I regret this? Yes. I’m learning not to but this isn’t always easy. This journey is one day at a time. Some days that’s an understatement indeed…”
Sean Anderson
Embracing the past without taking prisoners or letting the past control our narrative, this is living life without regrets. Focusing on living our best life today instead of in the past, this is life without regrets.
This is not an argument for denying our past. The pivotal question is how do we use the wreckage of our past to create a compelling narrative for our future? How do we use this compelling narrative at critical moments to make the most empowering decisions regarding our future? That’s The Game.
Promise 5 states “…no matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others…” The past is fact. Facts are data. Data informs but it doesn’t have to limit the present nor define the future. I call the experience of my shit being of benefit to others finding my WHY. That’s The Game I want to win.
“…Laughter in the midst of shit, that’s my WHY. I am going thru some difficult financial stuff right now. Money ain’t growing on trees right now. I have plenty to cry over but I’m going to laugh at the worry, self-pity and fear. They are with me but they don’t get to drive the car. I’ve learned to laugh at their driving. This is part of remaining sane and finding and embracing my WHY…”
Yalie
“…Liberating others with empowering words. That’s my WHY. I know my Words have power…”
the Professor
“…Telling stories that make a difference to others. That’s my WHY. If people ain’t fans of this work, fuck ‘em. Life is too short. I have a difference to make and I will never make it listening to folks who don’t give a damn. This is finding and being committed to my WHY…”
Hunter
I said earlier life is not a game. Well in some respects or aspects it is kind of a game. Among card players and gamblers, it’s said “…when you walk in a room and don’t see a mark, it’s because it’s you…” Again, Promise 2 states “…we are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness…” We may not be card players or gamblers. But if we have not experienced the freedom as Promise 2 states, maybe it’s because we are the mark in the game of life. If we have not yet found life is getting better, maybe it’s because we are allowing people, places and things to manipulate and control us. If we have yet to come to the realization that God is doing more for us right now than we could ever do for ourselves, maybe we can benefit from the lessons Sean Anderson acknowledged he needed to learn: 1) how to trust the God of my understanding; 2) how to interact with God and to understand I am perfectly created by Him; 3) how to feel God’s presence with me; 4) how to love the God of my understanding; and 5) how to “be present” in those pivotal moments in my daily experiences when I am about to make some unwise choices, and how to find the God of my understanding in these pivotal moments.
Getting to this level of consciousness, this is when life gets better and we stop being and playing the mark. Getting to this level of consciousness, this is when we begin to see ourselves as God sees us and become what God would have us become. This is when we no longer regret the past. This is when we experience the Power of our WHY for life. This is when we catch a glimpse of our true north and a new heaven and earth. That’s life getting a whole lot fucking better. I don’t’ know about you Scott but this is The Game I’m determined my blackass is going to win.
Read more about X, Yalie, Fr. Esteban, the Professor, Sean Anderson and Hunter and tell your story. Listen to Hunter’s Podcast. All on wreckedamerica.com. In Wrecked America, #TheGameMatters
The Struggle Continues….
