Today, I shared in the meeting. I talked about acting out with prostitutes years ago while on a church junket to Cuba. I disclosed for the first time in a group I had a Master of Divinity Degree from Yale and was an ordained Episcopal priest. That was wild. I shared how in Embracing the Gift of My Faults (EGF) I had overcome the debilitating shame of my past. Or, at least I’m working on it. I stated I didn’t believe my addictions were a demon but a Cast of Characters (C of C’s) run amok. Let’s see, there is Fr. Esteban, Yalie, X, Hunter, and, oh yea, the Professor. It can get busy in my world at times but this is the mess that has given me a message. I hope (smile).
I call outing my Characters, “The Heat” — naming them and giving them a voice and the space to own their part in my addictions or tell their side of my story. This opening up could make me vulnerable but I also think of it as a positive power in a world of deceit and a lack of authenticity.
“…If you’re looking forward from a place that is false, what you’re looking forward to is the road to hell…”
Unknown
The Heat is also on my characters by my mere presence In These Rooms. I believe I am In These Rooms to listen for the voice of my Higher Power in the stories of the people and to seek His face in their faces. But, my Character X has a different take on these rooms. “…I am here on behalf of my community. I come from people who are tired of being pimped by both major political parties and their minions. If I can learn something by being In These Rooms, going thru this 12-step shit, if I can learn something that will help my community give a damn about our freedom, then yea I’m down with that…” Thank you X.
“…Stories are transformation unveiled–either of characters or situations or both. If nothing gets altered or unveiled, you don’t have a story but a series of images or a chronicle of events…If your protagonist has no goal, makes no choices, has no struggles to overcome, you have no plot nor story…”
Steven James
The Struggle Continues…
